Things That Are Used as Fake Cum in Porn

There’s a fun scene at the beginning of the movie Thunderball where Sean Connery is chased by assassins and must use his gadget-laden sports car to escape. At the flick of a button, firetruck hoses emerge from below his tail lights and blast the pursuers with a heavy torrent of water. All well and good, but there’s no way a sports car could contain water tanks large enough to sustain such a blast.

Why do we bring up this seemingly irrelevant bit of cinematic nitpicking on a porn blog? Well, porn cumshots occasionally seem to suffer from the same logistical conundrum. We’re probably not spoiling anything to say that the cumshots you see in porn may not always be completely real. Sure, most scenes feature genuine ejaculations, but could anyone who sees the volcanic eruptions of the Monsters of Jizz series truly think that such scenes are completely devoid of movie magic? VICE probed the particulars of porn moneyshots in the new article “Porn Stars Reveal the Secret to Massive Cum Shots.”

 According to the article, the following substances have supposedly been used as fake cum in porn (or in other corners of sexual subculture):

  • methyl cellulose (a viscous gel that has numerous less salacious applications, ranging from bookbinding to cookery)
  • Cetaphil (Ironically, this is generally used as a face cleanser. Johnny Sins told VICE that it looks exactly like cum but “doesn’t taste that great.”)
  • specially designed “fake cum” lubes along the lines of Master Series: Jizz Lube
  • a recipe using egg whites, yogurt, water, cornstarch, and salt
  • shampoo
  • body wash
  • condensed milk

Also check out VICE’s “Oral History of the Cumshot” for a fun look back at how the moneyshot became such a popular feature of modern pornography. Oh, and browse cumshot-themed movies here!

Featured image: Monsters Of Jizz Vol. 29: Facials