Getting Creamed for Pi Day
If you work in the adult industry, porn will hijack certain words in your vocabulary. “ATM” might be the place most of your friends think of putting their PIN, but to you, it evokes an entirely different type of insertion. “Gonzo” might suggest freewheeling images of Hunter S. Thompson and Johnny Depp to many people, but for those with a job in porn, it just means in-your-face XXX action. Creampie is another term that is never quite the same. No longer a delicious dessert, the expression brings to mind a creamy finish of another variety entirely. Creampie porn has blossomed into a popular genre over the past two decades, swelling to well over 2,000 titles in Adult Empire’s porn DVD category page alone. Pi Day, the March 14th celebration of math and baked goods inspired by the famous 3.14 ratio, is the perfect moment to explore the genre. It’s also ideal timing for Evil Angel’s anticipated new assembly of creampies, the first such scenes for the company, in Jonni Darkko‘s Evil Creampies.
“A man ejaculates inside a woman or man’s anus or woman’s vagina leaving the semen dripping out of the orifice.” That’s the clinical and rather cold definition of a creampie in Nicolae Sfetcu’s The Art of Movies. It seems almost odd that a sex act based on the most prosaic of maneuvers — this is essentially just having “normal” sex in a sense, if one sets aside the theater of having the result “drip out” — would find itself restyled as a quirky fetish. How did things “come” to this?
Last fall, VICE had creampie master Sir Ron offer a rundown of creampie porn. “Our project started back in 1994 in response to the adult industry only doing facials—scene where a guy jizzes on another porn star’s face,” he said. “Instead, we wanted creampies to become a variation of a popshot. You have five scenes in a movie. You don’t want to see cumshots in all of them. We were over it.” The resulting innovation slowly began to catch on, though popular use of the term “creampie” didn’t arrive until the early 2000s. (The Routledge Dictionary of Modern Slang and Unconventional English marks it as entering the lexicon in about 2002.) Interestingly, Sir Ron himself was surprised at the chord the genre struck. “We never meant for creampie to become a fetish, with an entire series devoted to creampie-only scenes. All we wanted was for one scene to be a creampie, vaginal or anal, and mix it up a little,” he told VICE.
Evil Angel’s new creampie effort has been a top secret project, with the company deliberately taking a cagey, noncommittal stance on the movie’s subject to build buzz and excitement. It was even code-named “Secret Darkko Project” at one point. “Anticipation got so high that some fans went on fact-finding missions to figure out what the secret project is,” Evil Angel’s Chris Gentile told AVN. “A few figured it out, and then in the last week, somebody leaked the movie itself.” (The application of the word “leaked” here is presumably not an accident.)
Darkko himself found the genre exciting terrain to explore. “I really like shooting creampies because it’s been so many years of facial cum shots,” he said. “I really dig watching girls eat cum out of pussy. It’s one of the hottest things ever.”
