Everyone Loves a Good Scare: Halloween x3

Dueling porn spoofs are nothing new. Just this year, HBO’s Game of Thrones saw twin spoofs from Hustler and Zero Tolerance. Films that have become cultural touchstones are particularly ripe for the multi-parody treatment: John Carpenter’s seminal horror flick Halloween has no less than three horror spoofs. The continuing saga of Michael Myers is perfect material for a porn spoof, with oversexed babysitters, an “anywhere, USA” look that’s easy to recreate, an antagonist with a mask fetish who carries around phallic objects, and an original director who looks very much like John Holmes (no, seriously).  In honor of this night of ghouls, ghost and goblin host, we’re taking a look at this trio with a guide to Halloween porn parodies.

Official Halloween Parody Porn MovieOfficial Halloween Parody (Zero Tolerance)

Cast: Lexi Belle, Chanel Preston, Dana DeArmond and more

Fidelity to the original: True to its status as the official parody, this Halloween recreates the plot of the original scene-by-scene, with impressive production values to boot. It will come as no surprise, though, to learn that protagonist Laurie Strode remains altogether less virginal than she did in the first version.

Slogan spoofery: Halloween‘s original slogan was “The night he came home,” which was frankly begging to be satirized. Zero Tolerance spoofs it with “The night he came!”

Box art adventures: Zero Tolerance proudly accentuates the “official” nature of the movie by using authentic Halloween poster images, including the pumpkin hand and the William Shatner mask.

The critics said: “The movie had a great pace and it was actually made like a horror movie with actual porn . . . definitely a movie that you must have in your porn collection.” (Willy Milano, Coolest Porn Reviews)


Halloween XXX Porn Parody Porn MovieHalloween XXX Porn Parody (Smash Pictures)

Cast: Lexi Belle, Lily LaBeau, Britney Amber and more

Fidelity to the original: Smash‘s effort follows the flow of the original plot, with a few eyebrow-raising additions: they have the chutzpah to make a Michael/Laurie coupling that you certainly wouldn’t find in the Carpenter movies, for obvious reasons.

Slogan spoofery: Having been scooped by Zero Tolerance on the puns involving “came,” Smash simply goes with “based on the original version.”

Box art adventures: Smash uses the scream queen look, with three (mostly) terrified beauties on the cover. The subtle reflection of Lexi Belle in the knife blade is a nice touch.

The critics said: “One of the most enduring horror movie franchises gets the porn parody treatment from director Jim Powers and Smash Pictures . . . this is one release you’ll want to pick up in time for All Hallows Eve.” (Buzz Killington, AVN)


This Isn't Halloween... It's A XXX Spoof! Porn MovieThis Isn’t Halloween… It’s A XXX Spoof! (White Ghetto)

Cast: Ariella Ferrara, Courtney Taylor, Jessi Palmer and more

Fidelity to the original: You might say this one slashes out in its own direction. Instead of the familiar plot of a worldless sociopath returning to his hometown to wreak havoc, White Ghetto switches things around by focusing on a series of nymphos who have escaped from a sex addiction clinic.

Slogan spoofery: The Night She Came… Home!

Box art adventures: The Michael Myers surrogate wields not a knife, but a vibrating dildo.

Browse more Horror porn movies here.

Happy Halloween from Adult Empire!